Site logo

The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I bokeh was kept awake all night bokeh by a woman memek in a nearby memek room screeching so bokeh loudly that I wondered if I should bokep offer to perform an exorcism.

crot When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for memek caterwauling) to the bokeh receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and bokep declared memek the woman an ‘actrice’, crot or bokeh sex worker.

Now, memek according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it porn all makes scientific sense. It confirms bokep crot what most women know and memek all men dread – the bokep louder the cry bokep of ecstasy, porn the greater the porn chance the bokep orgasm crot is being faked. In other words, bokeh you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, crot memek and bokep sex crot as genuine intimacy. And bokep when a woman is genuinely aroused, porn trusts her partner and bokep is not fearing for bokep crot a fragile male ego, crot she’s far more likely bokeh to gently sigh and crot moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in porn my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review bokep magazine, bokeh female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. bokep bokep bokeh It bokep was crot generally on an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, bokeh bokep so they crot could make their bokeh partner feel happy, bokep while conserving their energy for bokeh other tasks in hand. This was porn the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and crot ‘manipulation’, bokep and porn that women were porn prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, memek so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the greater the chance porn the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: crot ‘I’m porn enjoying this, crot but can bokep you crot get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, memek ladies?

The only other reason bokeh to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes porn from porn, bokep where loud always equals memek better.

As a crot woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned memek out their TVs: crot bokeh ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokeh only if you memek want to attract a bokep certain kind of attention.

In their book, memek Sex At Dawn, bokep Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women porn were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If you’re memek a sex worker, bokeh I porn crot can understand bokeh the need to advertise. But if you’re bokeh not, bokeh then men should take heed: porn bokep the bokep best sex may just be the quietest.